e most important aspect I think in counseling, is for a helping professional/therapist (regardless of title) to hold the space for clients. This sounds easy but requires tremendous work on the counselors part to clear their own mental noise to be fully available, fully present. Second, it requires that person to have the willingness to hold that space for the other. This can be done in intimate relationships as well. The more mindful you become the easier it gets. Holding the space, entails the power of intention. The intentionality behind it is being available for the other person, for their healing of past wounds or for their growth in this moment. Both of which are sacred. Check out my blog on Love, The Greatest of All where I explore Thich Nhat Hanh’s mantras to prepare me for consciously meeting with any client or loved one. This is the epitome of what Carl Rogers defines as unconditional positive regard.
When you hold the space in an individual therapy, you allow the present moment to unfold without your own agenda. You allow the here and now to guide the session to the most prominent need. And simply by being clear and available, change happens. Moments of awareness come and the client is led by their own knowingness (even if they are unconscious) to their potentiality. This is what counseling theorist refer to as Self-Actualization.